man...they don't know

without hesitation

you can't hide from me!

once i see you, you're dead! dead, i tells ya! you hear me?! no escaping! you're not faster than me...and you sure as hell ain't bigger. you can't fucking hide! i'ma get you every time! leave you laid out and drenched! i fucking hate you!

instant ragret

i know i shouldn't have. i know i didn't want to...but a part of me did. however small that part was, it was louder and more powerful than the other part that told me not to proceed. i did it anyway. i wish i didn't. ..

nothing of the past were visible in those eyes. not an ounce remained. no remnants. it was like a stranger...like, someone had an intimate vendetta against me, took their time implementing their scheme, and unleashed it after over a decade of being dormant. i mean, was i THAT blind? i pride myself in being aware; more awared than others. then again, was everyone around me blinded, too? this can't be real. ..yet, it is?

i try to move on. i AM trying to move on. i am moving on. i've MOVED on! ...or have i? my soul soaked the impact like a sponge when i seen it, now leaving me with this heavines...i thought. ..guess i thought wrong. but, but...i rarely miscalculate. is this just residual effects? i need to breathe. i need air. this will require time...yet i don't need space. my heart is beating so loud that anymore space than what i have right now will just be drums echoing this negativity. this doubt. lack of self worth. failure.

none of which i shall succumb to. i will right this ship. it's been done before...it can be done again. i've been through the worst. this is just removing the gooey substances leftover from peeling the bandaid.

fact #3916

your #mcm has a side fade, modern day fuckboy look, driving a two-tone car with the music of someone rich blasting and his side panels rattling

*sips tea*

hope i'm doing this right

2nd time with a smoothie. this time i remembered the Greek yogurt; however, it made my shit look chicken shit gray. taste delicious tho...hoping to get some whey soon and add it. so far using: blueberries, strawberries, banana, spirulina, soy milk, Greek yogurt, and all natural peanut butter